Remembrance Day is About....?

Canadians celebrate. The significance of World War 1 in particular, was that it was the start of a birth of a nation, Battle of Vimy Ridge, 1917 Canadian troops made a significant contribution to the British cause that led to other victories, therein ending World War I. Canadians celebrate and honor those brave men who lost their lives not only in World I but also World War II. If it were not for those men, Canada would not be the nation that is today without their sacrifice, so I am told. Where is God in this picture and is this question warranted?

Let me begin by saying this: Three weeks ago, I should have been killed in a head on car collision. So by now means am I relegating the death of those veterans. Life can change in a matter of seconds. Ask me, I know only to well.Most people who know me in Canada can testify that I'm proudly South African, all be it wearing a springbok supporters jersey, scarf etc. They may see the significance but they are also aware of my patriotism. The same holds true in this case, I see significance of Remembrance Day in Canada and I'm aware of their patriotism. If the purpose for Remembrance Day is for paying respects, I'm all for it. After all mourning is biblical and there are ton's of references. If it is to honor and celebrate those veterans who died and Canada is a nation because of it, then in my opinion it is different matter altogether.

Every year at Bishops, in an Anglican Church School in South Africa, we held a remembrance day service. The difference, Thank you God for the lives of those etc..I think this is significant and should not be underscored. Who started the war? What were the reasons? Who fought against who? The bottom line, man fought against man each side had their reasons. What world explanation is there that 44 million men and many more civilians died because of the war?There are none. The world was divided no doubt but these events were symptoms of a root problem-sin. A world living in a presence of itself and its desires, not caring for the other person. When will we take the responsibility? The "problem with the world? Me. Your sincerely..." a reader wrote in the British telegram.

Based on my observation since I have been living in Canada,I quote "We celebrate and honor the lives of those veterans." Is there valid reason for giving this appraisal? Canada would not be the nation that it is today because of the veterans. Look at the parable of the Prodigical Son. The scandal of the parable is that the younger son ask his father for his share of the inheritance while his old man was still living. "I want your money but I want nothing to do with you. John Dickson's in Simply Christianity, when speaking about the parable, "we enjoy our money,clothes, possession but through ignorance or neglect we fail to acknowledge our Creator. This is the heart of sin, we are distant from God (Luke 15:13, distant country) the fact that the son lived widely was simply symptomatic."

This post has nothing to with question of evil,war or those save the world campaigns. Is it right that veteran's are accredited to Canada's prosperity? With no intent of desensitizing the sanctity of life, I will say the following. It was a man who fought and was a man who was killed in a war. The point, in celebrating national prosperity on the basis of veteran's are we not praising ourselves? Placing faith in ourselves, the very one's who obliterated one another.Hardly seems enlightening. Then we will philosophize and debate items like nature/nurture find 'solutions' and go on living. The sad thing, it is common and its called culture.

Ask any veteran alive why they participate in remembrance day. You'll get a humble response, "In memory of my comrade, who fought alongside me." The marketed public appraisal "Lest we not forgot,"-its because of those that fought that we live the life we have. This rhetoric of "Lest we not forget," sentiment is an altogether different matter than lamenting after a forgotten soldier. I ask, "Lest we forget, Who?"

-Lloyd

I am in awe of Your Grace

Tomorrow I start classes, labs. exams again. Ready to move on but I just so grateful and In awe of God's grace and mercy. I suck at describing things in words so like usual I came across a song that has can translate my thoughts, song written by Switchfoot called the "Economy of Mercy."

There's just two ways to lose yourself in this life
And neither way is safe
In my dreams I see visions of the future
But today we have today
And where will I find You?

In the economy of mercy
I am a poor and begging man
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins
In the colors of Your goodness
In the scars that mark your skin
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins

These carbon shells
These fragile dusty frames
House canvases of souls
We are bruised and broken masterpieces
But we did not paint ourselves
And where will I find You?

In the economy of mercy
I am a poor and begging man
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins
In the colors of Your goodness
In the scars that mark your skin
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins

Where was I when the world was made?
Where was I?

I'm lost without You here
Yes, I'm lost without You near me
I'm lost without You here
You knew my name when the world was made

-Lloyd

My State of Mind

There is a song written by Lifehouse (Christian Band) called "Broken." I guess the song encompasses my confusions, my pain, the uncertainty, questions of faith. What I like about the song the most that it deals with questions of faith when wrestles with some sought of trauma. The main point of the song, no matter the pain, the trauma as a christian you find "meaning" in your suffering (Romans 8:28). Holding onto God's word: "And I'm hanging on, to the words you say/You said that I will, will be okay," that is what going to get you though. Exercising your dependence on God, allowing Him to dictate things, that is what makes whatever the situation is, "okay." You may feel "lost" at present but you will find your "way back home."


The Broken clock is a comfort
It helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow
From steeling all my time
And I am here still waiting
Though I still have my doubts
I am damaged at best
Like you've already figured out

I'm falling apart
I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart
That's still beating
In the pain
There is healing
In your name
I find meaning
So I'm holding on (I'm holdin on)(I'm holdin on)
I'm barely holding on to you

The broken locks were a warning
You got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded
I'm an open book instead
And I still see your reflection
Inside of my eyes
That are looking for purpose
They're still looking for life

I'm falling apart
I'm barely breathing


With a broken heart
That's still breating
In the pain (In the pain)
Is there healing
In your name
I find meaning
So I'm holding on (I'm still holdin on)(I'm holdin on)
(I'm still holdin on) (I'm holdin on)
I'm barely holding on to you

I'm hanging on another day
Just to see what, you will throw my way
And I'm hanging on, to the words you say
You said that I will, will be okay
The broken light on the freeway
Left me here alone
I may have lost my way now
But I haven't forgotten my way home

I'm falling apart
I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart
That's still beating
In the pain (In the pain)
There is healing
In your name (In your name)
I find meaning
So I'm holding on (I'm still holdin')(I'm holdin' on)(I'm still holdin') (I'm holdin' on) (I'm still holdin')
Barely holding on to you (I'm still holdin on)
Barely holdin on to you

-Lloyd

Time to Close the Book on this Episode

Today has been my "first day" back at University. Its been weird, but at this stage-for me anyway it is about getting back into a routine again. I'm very grateful that my lecturers have given me a break, in terms of writing exams, coming to class, going to labs etc. Everyday is getting better, slowly but surely. By Monday, I should be back to "normal," whatever the word normal means. The insurance company sent photo's of the vehicle today. I've seen the wreck, and I think it is time that I move on. Thank you God that I'm still alive, it was truly a miracle, that deserves your praises to be sung.


-Lloyd

Dealing with Reality-Part 3

A strategy to overcome trauma, the manual "Self Confrontation," to summarize: Do not look back at but move forward.

Paul reminds us in Philippians, that it is not enough just to look back but to move forward.

Philippians 4:12-13, "Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Lastly, "speak of the goodness of the Lord and the recent difference He has made in your life."

Collosians 4:6, "Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone."

Things to consider. Just two days ago I "should have been killed in a vehicle accident." In no way did I intend to endorse this book more than the Word of God. I am still feeling the after effects of the accident but in working through this manual, I realized two things.

The importance of God's word and that his Word is timeless. There were many sound biblical references to various points. I shared a couple that were relevant to my situation. Firstly to deal with this trauma by speaking about it. Secondly, to testify of God's grace He has lavished upon us. Lastly, to serve as an encouragement to you in lieu of my situation. I cannot express in words how grateful I am to God, for giving me a second chance at life. This car collision was nothing short of a miracle.

-Lloyd

Dealing with Reality-Part 2

The second idea that highlighted my attention in "Self Confrontation" is the "powerful love of Jesus Christ that disarms fear."

I love this point so much that I'm copying out verbatim: "Christ's love empowers you to be an overwhelming conqueror is any situation of life (Romans 8:35-39), as you exercise your faith in and through Him (1 John 5:4-5)."

Romans 8:35-39, "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: 'For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.'No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

1 John 5:4-5, "for everyone born of God overcomes the world. This is the victory that has overcome the world, even our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world? Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God."

Lastly, "Perfect love casts out fear."

1 John 4:18, There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment."

I cannot begin to grasp the depth of God's love. He sent Jesus to die for you and for me. What do I have fear? Nothing., except to echo Chris Tomlin's song, "How Great is Our God."

"How Great is Our God, sing with me how Great is our God!"

-Lloyd

Dealing with Reality-Part 1

So how do I deal with the trauma of a horrific accident? One thing for sure, I should have been killed! Having replays being played out on the road when my parents are driving, when I'm sleeping? After feeling the pain of bruised kidney, blood in urine for the next couple of days, sore right ankle, what's next? Constant pain? My year in perspective: the hospital has been "home" more often than not. I must be so close to being granted VIP status. Is there any hope for me. I can say yes, yes, yes!!! Let me explain:

Since returning home (Sunday evening), I have been reading a book, "Self Confrontation" developed by John C. Broger. An idea presented in the book about anxiety/worry caused by events, have been immensely helpful.

First response to these circumstances of life is: Fear God!
The result of fearing God can bring salvation, wisdom and knowledge etc but reason number 7 stood out for me the most: "that fearing God demonstrates His goodness and loving kindness towards me."

Psalm 103:13, "As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him."

Seeing my life change in a matter of seconds while behind a wheel of a car, really sought of shook me. It also reminded me of mine mortality, but I have do not have to fear death. Jesus rose from the dead!

Romans 6:5-7, "If we have been united with him like this in his death, we will certainly also be united with him in his resurrection. For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin because anyone who has died has been freed from sin."

Lastly,it was hard for me to forgot about a person called Job. His life was changed in a matter of seconds. Fearing God can invoke gratitude about the countless blessings He has provided for you and for me. The bible's description of Job, "blameless,upright; he feared God and shunned evil." It is not hard to see why Job was described as a righteous man. When disaster, knocked on his front door, Job 1:20-22:

"At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship and said: Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised."

Disasters happen all the time. After the head on collision took place, once I figured I was alive ( I thought at the point of impact I'm dead)! I immediately thanked God. It was only afterwards, when I left the vehicle in pain, shocked and in bewilderment did I truly appreciate the magnitude of this miracle, God spared me. Most people die in head on collisions. Usually, both parties concerned, but in my case no fatalities, just minor injuries!

My question, Do I Lloyd praise God enough? I can say yes when in suffering or disasters. Humbly I'm compelled to say no. What about the good times? C.S. Lewis said, "God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." I need to fear Him and praise Him, everyday.

-Lloyd

A Day of Two Halves-Part 2

Thank God, I am still alive. I mean literally thank God. I was involved in serious head on car collision that should have left me as good as dead. The vehicle is a complete write off. The moment, my parents van was hit, I thought was dead. This was it!

I'm still in shock and shaken. The accident is constantly being replayed in my mind, over and over. The more, and more the accident is being replayed in my mind, the more and more I continue to think of God's grace. I escaped with a bruised kidney, how I survived, there is no other explanation. The people of the vehicle were in shock but I understand and witnessed them doing okay, the paramedic also confirmed this fact . They overcame no serious injuries. Again I say, Thank God.

This event is a miracle and testament to God's grace. You always hear about peoples' stories of close death experiences, never thinking that one day, it can be you. Your life can change in a matter of seconds. Again all I can add is, thank God. I'm not scared of dying because I share in hope of the resurrection of Jesus. God has given me a second chance. Thank Him.

-Lloyd

A Day of Two Halves-Part 1

Nkosi Sikela iAfrica

World Cup Champions 07. Yeah come on. Brings Back memories for me of World Cup 95 as a kid in South Africa. I shed a few tears when I saw the cup was lifted. You can take me out of South Africa but you can't take South Africa out of me. My blood is Green.

-Lloyd

Back at University

It's been a good week in which I have been able to "ease" in and settle down. Moved in on Monday to Residence. I saw the specialist for a follow up on Tuesday. In his own words "Lloyd if you want answer about your abdominal pain I have none. Not even my diagnoses fitted the results." So I guess that will be a mystery after all.

In terms of reflecting back on the past nine months that has been rough on me physically, I'm glad and thankful that I landed between a rock and a hard place. God has really built me into stronger character. I said on my blog March 02 whilst reading Romans 5:3-5, "I have to rejoice for my physical suffering. I guess, I wasn't the complete character. For this very reason I will rejoice because in my distress, God will help me build character." At the time, I was confused, dejected and weak. Truth be told I wasn't the complete character then and God in his infinite mercy has built me into a stronger character over these nine months.

In my quiet time today reading my Bible I came across a verse, more or less emphasizes the same point. Quoting Philippians 2: 13, " for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose."

HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD!

-Lloyd

Mission Trip 07

After a ten day mission trip, I'm sort of exhausted. A wonderful of time in growing spiritually and sharing the gospel. Tired? Yeh! Enjoyed the trip and prayer the God will draw those kids who He has chosen.

Tomorrow I'm headed to Alberta, Edmonton, to drop Uwen off at his University residence, his very first year of University and of life of independence . I've never been to Edmonton, should be fun. I'll try to make the most of it, University begins next week!

-Lloyd

Medical Mystery SoLVeD!

I have answers, finally! After all the blood tests, scans and lastly all the "scopes" that have been performed the specialist has come to sound conclusion. A sound conclusion I may add, that is like a double edged sword. I am "100% healthy but the pain can last for up to and including a full year." What I had was "rare infection." This whole saga has cruel twist of irony. You see, during the month March, I casually joked with my friends "I've been in pain the entire year, it is now March, there is still nine months to go, bring it on!" What was once a joke, is now becoming a reality! Oh I'm feeling very, very, oh so humble . I'll blame that comment on my body's testosterone levels at that moment in time. At the end of the day, every guy deserves to have one excuse to rival the "women's time of the month syndrome!"
Seriously, Thank you God for your loving provision and for my many brother's and sisters who prayed for me over last eight months.

-Lloyd

"The Lack of the Wisdom of God"

Amongst the confusion of my circumstances (my health? upcoming months?) my head was stuck between a rock and a hard place.What next? Firstly, my long last youth pastor who I miss, had great post (Proverbs Part 1 on wisdom, when you have time click here). Secondly, I been reading a good commentary on the book of Joshua by Dale Ralph Davis. On Joshua 9:3-15 , he echoes the need for God's wisdom, entitled "The Lack of the Wisdom of God."

The Israelites had all signs in front of their eyes (v4-5, 12-13), believing the testimony v9-11. The problem was not so much they asked the right questions but they made the decision on their own, Davis points outs v14, "they did not inquire of the Lord." What they should have done was inquire to the Lord through Eleazer the priest according to the law (Numbers 27:31), "He is to stand before Eleazar the priest, who will obtain decisions for him by inquiring of the Urim before the LORD. At his command he and the entire community of the Israelites will go out, and at his command they will come in."

Davis adds this warning , "Joshua 9 warns God's people against such cocky independence. In the context of our various trials we need wisdom to know how to function in those trials and circumstance...available from a giving God, and we are to ask for (James 1:5)."

After reading these comments, suddenly upcoming events do not appear to be complicated. Israel learned the hard way, they made the oath alone and had to bear the consequences (Joshua 9:18-21). In the times of doubt I need to seek His wisdom to deal with my health, upcoming studies and other things. I must walk with Him. At the time my judgments appeared to be right but just like Israel somehow, the problem with "common sense" just never occurred to me!

-Lloyd

The Appointment

So, finally an appointment has been made with the gastreonologist. He'll have the proud honor in carrying out a colonoscopy on the 25th of July. If you don't know what a colonoscopy is, I'll leave that to your imagination. Prepping for the procedure takes two days and for good reason I'm advised to stay home. The medication cleans you up real good!


This is a safe procedure. Just the thought, is a little intimidating. Its been a while since I've last blogged, more will come...

-Lloyd

1st Week Off

Well, exams are over. Four months of summer vacation await me. Beginning May ending middle of September. Now its time, for me to find a part time job. Its boring just having so much time, at my own disposal. Hey, that was not a complaint, because everyone in my position would not refuse a summer holiday. I spent my first day of holiday taking my Grandmother to Calgary Airport, on her trip back to homeland, South Africa. She been living with us for almost a year, Can't believe time fly so quickly. It was great having her over for such a long time. From there she accompanied by a friend ours, Elaine, back to Cape Town.

Elaine and my Gran

-Lloyd

What an Easter Weekend

One word to describe my Easter weekend: Unbelievable !

Firstly, the non significant event- I'd never thought I'd admit defeat, the day South Africa loses against Bangladesh. Every team is allowed a "hiccup" at ICC CWC 2007. Regardless of that slip, I still back Graeme and the Boys to bring the World Cup Home. Call me stupid, optimistic and uneducated. Still a lot of cricket left, South Africa beat the Windies, their in the semi's. I calculated the run rate. I stand by my team, My Country!

Now to the Unbelievable:

• Christ death on the Cross absolutely scandulous! God's grace is truly scandulous, as to why me of all people, as a sinner to be worthy of receiving His grace, for all the pain, humilation and death-Jesus had to endure.Scandulous I'll tell you!
• Met a South African Family who are taking my Granny back home at the end of the month. Local is altyd lekker. Hulle is ordenlike Kaapenaars. Memories of the Taxi (Wynberg! Wynberg!) reminded me of the good old days. Amongst other things I truly enjoyed the fellowship we all shared in Christ.
• Easter Sunday had a great lunch with parents friends. Again, a wonderful time in fellowship.

The biggest highlight of Easter Sunday was also listening to sermon on TV by Charles Price on the Ressurection of Christ, 1 Cor 15. A great sermon, outlining them importance and the significance of Jesus rising from the dead so that we may have everlasting life.

Though my pain has become unbearable (been suggested that I'd take an extremely strong pain killers) I will not. Firstly the side effects. Secondly, I'll soldier on with Christ depending on His strength. I could'nt care less about the fact that I have been unhealthy the entire year, "I want to know Christ more." Everyday, after reading his word I want to know Him more. Listening to Fevertree (S.A. rock band) hit "Beautiful" stresses my desire. "Lift me up/off my knees (x2)/ spin me round/turn me back/turn in me inside out/ Call my name/raise me up/Bring me close to You/ All You Are has become/ so much more to me/Cause You Beautiful/and I want you to know how I feel/Cause You Beautiful/Oh yes, You deserve all I am/Give me hope/ That I need/ to be more like you/ Lift my hands (x2)/ As I sing to you/ Cause You're Beautiful/and I want you to know how I feel/Cause You're Beautiful/Oh yes You deserve all I am/Call my name/raise me up/Bring me close to You/ All You Are has become/ so much more to me..."

Well this will be my final post for the month, finals are lurking from next week until the end of the month. Speak to ya then.

-Lloyd

The Easter Story

This is the story of a repentant criminal who said: "We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong...Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." (Luke 23:38-43). Have a blessed Easter Weekend.

-Lloyd

The Twenty Fool?

Today an April fool turned twenty!

Take a good look at that fruitcake trying to do an impression.He tried and failed miserably. Guess you can never take an April fool seriously?

-Lloyd (Thank you Lord, for yet another year!)

I Need Sleep!

Wow, what a week of studying, no exams until Monday. Two on the same day, bumber!!!I could be all cranky and moan but I'm going to suck up it for change. Jesus exmaple of humality truely challenged me this week. John Chapter 13. What Jesus did for his disciples, demonstarting his love and gave them a picture of what He was about to do, so that we could have everlasting life. (Today, during a hectic week), it was great to share in fellowship with some brothers and sisters in Christ on campus.

And as for Mr Good Old Grizzly Bear, he has been evicted from his cave. I've taken over, today I was given permanent residency in Canada (meaning I can now leave and comeback to Canada as many times as I please, you could probably figure out where I would be headed t0... hopefully in the next year or so). Now I think it is time for me to retreat to my new found cave. I need...some.uh......sleep.

-Lloyd

A Soul Refreshing Truth

Doing Okay at the moment, I guess. I have days when I don't have the strength to get out of bed and then there are days we're I'll loathe in pain. Depressed? Maybe, but after buying Jars of Clay, Who we are Instead was a pleasant distraction. In fact it was refreshing. Musically, does not get better than this. Whether you're a fan or not (My unbiased rating, just remember Tree 63 is my ultimate followed by Switchfoot etc.) this album deserves 10/10.

Their change of sound from rock to folk/country/blues was masterclass in keeping their identity intact. Layman terms, they still sound like Jars of Clay and you can recognize them pretty easily. None of those lyric cliches that Contemporay Christian artist's have bashed to death. The main highlight or more specifically my point of today's blog. The one recurring theme in all of their songs:

Jesus Defines Who You Are.

Too often I think as God's people we often forget and need to reminded daily, that we are, who we are, because of Jesus. I'm pledge guilty, charged with guilt in the first degree. This all points to a simply yet abrupt conclusion. I'm sorry old sinner in deperate need of God's sore grace that comes only through his Son, Jesus.

-Lloyd